--New York City will officially ban two-liter bottles of soda with pizza deliveries next month. And something tells me, once THAT happens, no one in New York will ever be overweight or unhealthy again!
(CAREFUL)--New York City taxis will soon carry condom machines. Weird. I always thought part of the charm of sex in the back of a taxi was the risk of disease.
--Former Surgeon General C. Everett Koop has died at the age of 96. What a phony. You should never trust a "medical expert" who can't even make it to 97!
--Colorado will start promoting marijuana tourism. They already have a great slogan: "What Happens in Colorado, Stays in . . . Uh, Wherever We Are."
--A homeless man in New York is suing his parents for $200,000 because they didn't love him enough. In related news, I'm suing every woman I've ever dated.
--Tomorrow is Pope Benedict's last day on the job. Then he's on his way to the old Pope's home.
--A judge in Maine will decide whether jurors in a prostitution trial will get to review 577 "extremely sexual" Skype screenshots. The case is the first time in history where people are actually trying to get on the jury.






