Two Drunks Can't Make a Right ... or a Left
A New Jersey man is facing charges of driving while intoxicated after being hauled in while bailing out a friend who was behind bars for ... driving while intoxicated.
Joseph Shea was taken into custody after a witness saw him driving erratically at a high rate of speed, while in the parking lot of a south Jersey police station. He tried to flee when cops approached him for questioning, but didn't get far before being busted.
Shea was released without posting bail, and was picked up by a friend -- who hadn't had a drop to drink. No word on what happened to the original booze-hound driver. (Philadelphia Inquirer)
Just Meth-In' Around
A Kentucky man is in police custody after he went into a Wal-Mart bathroom and tried to bring the store the one product is was lacking -- a heapin' helping of meth!
James Prater aroused suspicion among store employees after they noticed he was spending an awfully long time in the can -- and when security guards went to check on him, they found him passed out on the floor. Cops summoned to the scene woke the 36-year-old and searched his backpack, in which they found all the makings of a working meth lab.
The store was evacuated -- and we're guessing the same could be said for Prater's innards, once he realized he was headed for jail (WKYT)
Rehab Plan Up In Smoke
A British retiree is set to be sentenced on drug charges after he was caught growing thousands of dollars worth of pot -- to pay for his son's stint in drug rehab.
Frank Jones admitted that he'd been tending the cannabis crop on his rural property, but insisted he was no hardened criminal, merely a concerned parent. The 74-year-old, who says he knew his actions were illegal, told a judge, "You tell me any parent who sees their son suffering who would not do just about anything to help them. When I learned what I was charged with, I was gobsmacked."
Just call it another good moneymaking plan gone to pot. (Daily Mail)
Hitting From Below The Belt
A man in Maine will have to spend five days in jail after he failed in an attempt to seduce his estranged wife, then slapped her in the face ... with his genitals.
Fred Thomas pleaded guilty to a variety of charges stemming from the incident, which took place after his wife of nearly 40 years slept at his house back in July. He offered her 20 bucks for a sexual encounter, and when she turned down the "opportunity," he grew angry and struck her with his penis -- a gesture his lawyer says was "not his normal conduct."
The wife did not seek jail time for Thomas but did ask that he undergo counseling for anger management, which was also ordered. (Bangor Daily News)
